Deranged Mind

December 21, 2008

Facebook Attention Whoredom Part II (or is it Part III?)

Filed under: Humor,internet — The Deranged One @ 2:50 am

This will be my third installment of stupid shit on Facebook. Before anybody thinks I’m obsessed with Facebook, I’m not. I just happened to hear this little gem on the radio today and thought I would look it up when I got home.

Apparently, the faceless purveyors of Facebook are hit or miss when it comes to people posting pictures of themselves breast feeding. Some of the photos are taken down and others are left. Personally, I don’t care and I certainly don’t go out of my way to look for pictures of people feeding their rugrats. But apparently, there’s a whole group who seem obsessed with breastfeeding.

Now don’t think I’m a prude. On the contrary, I could gaze at tits all day. But breastfeeding? So you also force the world to look at pictures of your kids smearing macaroni and cheese all over the place? Boy, that sounds really exciting. Instead, it strikes me as more Facebook Attention Whoredom. Yawn.

And here’s another thought – something which is somewhat dear to me. The women who are whining about their breastfeeding photos haven’t paid a single penny toward Facebook, have they? It’s a service that they use for free. It’s somebody else’s (or in this case, a company’s) website. On occasion, I get somebody bitching because they’ve posted something on one of my websites which is either inappropriate, pisses me off, or both. In any event, I take it down and the inevitable bitching begins. But in the end, it’s my website, bandwidth and money. So if you don’t like it, go start your own website.

Now if only Facebook would allow videos of the actual conception…

December 19, 2008

Facebook Attention Whoredom

Filed under: Humor,internet — The Deranged One @ 2:05 am

I was looking over things and discovered in ealier rant about Facebook, that I forgot to mention something else that I find totally worthless. XXXX is….. – that’s the box that says “What are you doing right now.” I’m typing on the computer, what the hell do you think? And people try to come up with witty statements that usually fall short. Or they go off the deep end and update us every few minutes. But it’s not real.

I was thinking that perhaps I should try to figure out the internet on cell phone (Verizon – suck ass service) and update Facebook every time I do something.

I am taking a shit.

I am wiping.

I am pissed because I dropped the phone in the toilet while wiping.

You get the idea. A bunch of fucking attention whore drama if you ask me. I have a couple of friends who are off the hook updating that shit. I swear, they spend more time on the damn computer than they do in real life. And if they didn’t spend so much time updating all of the people on Facebook on their daily activities, they’d probably have about 2 extra hours per day to accomplish shit. That’s their thing though.

I would like to see some real shit posted on Facebook – the kind that would bring a smile to my face.

Jane is fantasizing about having anal sex with the cashier at the grocery store even though he is probably only 17.

Dick is trying to think of a way to tell his wife he wants to have a threeway with her and her sister.

Now that would be keeping it real.

December 15, 2008

I Facebooked Your Mom

Filed under: internet — The Deranged One @ 12:47 am

A few months ago, the missus talked me into setting up a Facebook account. Social networking at it’s finest. What is social networking? Beats me. I do know that our 2nd eldest child had a bunch of drama when she was about 14 on myspace. I haven’t spent much time on myspace. Well, just enough time to see that there are a bunch of teenage girls who have dimly lit photos of themselves blowing kisses into the mirror so they can get a cell phone picture. That and a bunch of shit on their profiles that’ll induce seizures.
Anyway, Facebook. No big deal, or so I thought. The sister in law added me as a friend. And then the deluge started. I had people coming out of the woodwork sending friend request. There were a couple that I didn’t have a clue who they were. I had people I haven’t spoken to in 20 years suddenly wanting to be my friend. Apparently, a few of those people were too dense to figure out that there was a reason 20 years had passed.

And then the request began. Here’s a drink request. Kidnap request. Old toy request. Smelly underwear request. And on and on. Last time I checked, there were about 200 pending requests of one kind or another. I requests to join pet causes. I was quite excited when a friend of mine from work invited me to “feel my boobies” or something like that. Since she has a pretty abundant rack, I was all for it. I was dismayed when I discovered that it was some breast cancer awareness thing.

I guess Facebook is okay, but I don’t spend much time on it. Not like some people. My cousin wanted me to join some cause where everybody is planning to avoid (I think they mean boycott) Facebook for a day because they’re pissed about something or other. Fine with me. It’s just a website, not a way of life.

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